r.i.p. monkey town

Monkey Town has been a Williamsburg institution for some years now, founded by Mr. Montgomery Knott as a bar/dining room/gallery/performance space/other cool stuff place. Sadly, it is closing at the end of the month; but not before I got a chance to check out one of its feasts of hipsterdom.

Now way back in December of '09, we had a pretty tremendous snowstorm here in the city. By chance, I happened to have reservations for Monkey Town's ski-lodge-themed six course dinner extravaganza the next day. So it was pretty thrilling to trudge through a foot of snow into the cozy quarters of MT's dining area: A square room (secluded from the rest of the bar) with projector screens outfitting each wall, and low couches and tables lining the wall beneath. The ambiance was comparable to that of a nice independent movie theater and a really classy orgy at the same time.

As the guests (young, white people obsessed with novelty...like me!) filtered in, the screens sported "classic ski films" and a DJ spun "alpine sounds." The main event, however, was a screening of Werner Herzog's The Great Ecstasy of Woodcarver Steiner, a beautiful film documenting the accomplishments and emotions of a world-champion ski jumper.

And the food...

Course I: Bavarian Cheese Fondue
You can't really go wrong with fondue amiright.

Course II: Ginger Braised Rabbit
I had never had rabbit before, so this was exciting.

Course III: Roasted Garlic Soup
Mushrooms were involved here, so my opinion should probably be discounted.

Course IV: Seared Wild Salmon
I love salmon, and the lentils were a nice touch.

Course V: Gin Marinated Venison Loin
This was probably my favorite; I'm so glad I eat meat sometimes.

Course VI: Apple Streudel
With raspberry sauce and vanilla bean gelato. Just kidding this was obviously my favorite.

I'm really glad I got to experience this whole thing. As bourgy as it was, Monkey Town is a cool place and I'm sad to see it go.

You'd think they'd never been to a pig roast before

There isn't much to say about 3rd Ward's second annual pig roast that hasn't already been said, photographed, and probably betamaxed somewhere. But watching Marlow & Sons' Tom Mylan hack up a 200 pound pig is always a nice way to spend a summer Sunday afternoon, even if the line for pork tacos turns out to be far too long and then it starts raining and you give up and go to Fette Sau.

Cream cheese

So, I basically go to Bagelsmith (north 7th and bedford) every effing morning these days. Bagelsmith has great bagels, a friendly staff, and is right by the train - so it is a pretty logical thing to do i think. They also have some interesting cream cheese options that you just don't see everyday (today they were advertising a new "chocolate chip CC", which honestly sounds disgusting to me but I support innovation). For quite some time, my staple has been an everything bagel, toasted, with jalapeno cheddar cream cheese. The JCCC is phenomenal, and often featured at bagel brunch. But just when the bagelsmiths had started remembering me and my order, something enticing caught my eye. That's right: bacon scallion cream cheese. This is a really brilliant idea for a combo, and the ratio of bacon to scallion to cream cheese is just right. It almost makes going to work in the morning worthwhile!

Also, it is currently 9pm on a friday night. Will someone please hang out with me?

ladies who lunch later

as part of our concurrent quests to 1) eat every cheese plate in williamsburg and 2) make sure everyone thinks we're a couple, casey and i went to roebling tea room on roebling and metropolitan. rtr's cheese plate is modest, but to be fair so is its price. for $10 you receive a bunch of delicious bread, fig paste, capers, and two generous portions of cheese (which i'm assuming are not always the same, but i could be wrong). they also have some sort of weird unadvertised happy hour deal, so i'd ask about that so you don't order the one thing that isn't on it like i did. deeeeelicious.

Williamsburg Cheese

Apparently, the Spring of the Cheese Plate has arrived. For the second stop on our tour, k and I hit up d.o.c. wine bar, on the cozy corner of n. 7th and wythe. The wine menu here is impressive, it being a wine bar and all, and the food is pretty authentically italian. You are able to customize your cheese plate (which you will obviously be getting) with their fancy array of special cheeses, but out of a mutual aversion to decision-making, we went straight for the house cheese selection.

Tagliuere di Formaggi della Casa

About Blackbird

Blackbird Parlour, on bedford and n. 6th, has oft been labeled as a nice place with crappy service. I think this is a pretty accurate appraisal, but let's delve a little deeper.

Blackbird has a laid-back vibe that is perfectly suited to nursing a cup of coffee, (s)pot of tea, or glass of wine. Today I was pleasantly surprised to discover that they offer a fairly impressive brunch menu as well, with a charming selection of sandwiches, frittatas, and salads. There are also plenty of snackier options, and the requisite mimosa/bloody mary offering.

And now, the service. It's not that Blackbird has bad service. You sit down, they bring you a menu. They are pretty on top of that. Once you order, the food & drink is quick to come. After you ask for your check, you get your check. I guess that is really all you can ask. Just do not expect to doted upon. I don't believe any of my servers there have ever said more that 5 words to me, and they all seem to avoid eye contact at all costs. But really, when you think about it, is this any reason to cry foul?

Nah! All things considered, Blackbird is a great little spot in a super-convenient location with a pleasant ambience and satisfying menu. And if I was working there on a monday afternoon, I probably wouldn't want to talk to anyone who was having brunch on a monday afternoon either.

Miyako, WEyako

photo courtesy of freewilliamburg.com

Dreams came true last night at Miyako. Big ole thank you to everyone who came out last night. We missed you mwr, but someone needed to keep the tradition of someone not going to someone else's birthday thing alive.

I'm not really sure what everyone else had, but my Maki combo (tuna rolls, salmon rolls, & cali rolls) was just great. THEN, they even served me green tea ice cream (not two giant wasabi mounds). Naturally, I was in the bathroom while this happened.

Also, k got me this adorable parfait from chelsea's three tarts. I ate it for breakfast this morning and it was delicious as is it precious.

vegan taco!

image from freewilliamsburg.com


last night, p and i went to taco chulo - a "taco bar and margarita lounge" in williamsburg. their ingredients are very fresh, and you are able to make many crucial choices: which salsa you want, rice or potatoes, etc. i actually used to live on the same block (grand between marcy and havemeyer), but i always walked the extra few feet to lodge. mistake!

let's start with the drinks. p was good with his 32 oz. bottle of tecate, which was really entertaining to watch him drink. i had a couple of the house strawberry margaritas. now for my taco chulo margarita rant:

last time i ate at taco chulo, i had three frozen margaritas and didn't feel a thing. i asked the waitress about this, and she said that frozen margaritas are 90% water and that being much less alcoholic is their nature. while i'm not sure that i believe this completely (i've gotten drunk at chili's guys), and even though i really prefer frozen, i went ahead and ordered them unfrozen. it was delicious and obviously made with fresh strawberries. next time, i might try a beer cocktail. they have a lot of them, and they all sound pretty delicious.

now for the food. oh, the food. vegan mexican fare is hard to find, unless you customize a taco or a burrito to the point where it's just beans and lettuce. taco chulo has two vegan options, and is kind enough to mark them as such on the menu. i had a conejo taco, which was $4.50 and contained the following: whole beans, cabbage, salad mix, guacamole, rice, pico salsa, tofu sour cream. it came as a heaping pile of ingredients atop a couple tortillas, which i prefer as you're able to experience it as more of a salad before it becomes a taco. it was incredible, and the tofu sour cream (which i've always been curious about) was unobtrusive but necessary. all in all i'd give this taco a rating of mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. and for the omnivore's info: p had a chorizo taco and smacked his lips many, many times, so i'm pretty sure he loved it.

the only real problem with taco chulo is waitstaff. the service was very good in the beginning, but quickly went downhill. our waitress completely forgot about our order of chips and salsa, so it didn't come out until after the tacos. kind of awkward. it also took a very long time for us to get our check, which is one of my serious pet peeves. i don't mind if the food is slow to come out, but i get antsy if the check takes a long time.

as annoying as the service was, i really don't think it would prevent me from coming back for another conejo taco! delicious. i'd like to go back and try the other vegan taco soon if any other SPFs are interested!

Hi Moto

My first meal out this new year, after having spent the past week holed up eating mostly pasta and eggs (which is totally fine), was at Moto in south ass Williamsburg. It just felt right to put on my golden pointy shoes and venture out of my Greenpointy cocoon for my first-time trip to the timeless establishment.

The weather was definitely cold and possibly foreboding, as the forecast called for a chance of sleet. Wandering back and forth beneath the roar of the JMZ; wondering where my date was and what direction to go in, I began to doubt if this outing had been worth my special occasion barrette after all. But soon we found each other and found ourselves underneath the hanging bike on the corner of Broadway and Hooper, suggesting we had arrived (Moto lacks any real signage advertising its modest existence). Finally finding our refuge, it felt as if we had stumbled into a secret; passed through some sort of hidden portal.

The quite cozy space was nearly empty at first as we snuggled into a table by the window (and by the bar and by the kitchen. It's tiny). The JMZ still rumbled overhead, but inside the noise seemed almost comforting, as if the city around us was snoring. While the streets of south Williamsburg aren't the most inviting , looking out the window of Moto they seem old-fashioned instead of discomforting. The decor inside reflects this as well: dimly lit with sepia-toned pictures on exposed brick; classic music playing that you can't quite place.

Soon after we arrived, others seemed to catch on and the place steadily yet unobtrusively filled up. My meal, a prosciutto and brie panini, was utterly delectable, but not quite as mouthwatering as similiar fare of yore. J was somewhat disppointed in his ribs: as a "southern" boy he has high expectations. However, in my opinion, the garlic mashed potatoes served alongside could more than make up for any meaty mistakes. Washed down with their reasonably priced draught beer, the meal was everything we could have hoped for.

After visiting the very neat restroom (downstairs, cool toilet, weird mirror) we knew it was time to face the elements. Back outside, the freezing rain stung our hands and we struggled to hear one another through our hoods and over the train. Yet we were fully sated, having finally re-entered the real world by briefly stepping into another.

Pizza and a Beer

Picture from: www.freewilliamsburg.com

So New York is known for a number of things but value for food and drink is not one of them--especially not if you moved up here from cheap ass Florida (am I right?). Every once in a while, though, you stumble across a bargain that makes you do a double take. One of my first and still one of the best as far I'm concerned is the free pizza with a beer deal they have at Alligator Lounge and the Charlton. Last night I only had 5 dollars on me and there was no free ATM conveniently on the way to the Stoop (my bank started charginging!). This was a major problem because not only did I want to eat something but I wanted to drink beer too. Happily, when I got out of the subway I saw that martini drinking crustacean on the overhang beckoning. I prefer the Charleston to the Alligator Lounge not only because I find their aquatic mascot to be a bit more refined but the crust is typically a little crisper, at least on the outter edge. It is, of course, not the best pizza around but when it comes free with your beer whose complaining?

the finer diner

(Despite the fact that I completely disagree with all of you about br- vs. lunch, I’m going to keep posting on SPF because I know that you will all come around someday.)

Last night, mwr, Casey, and I went to Relish, a pretty conspicuous diner/restaurant in Williamsburg that I have always been confused by (there are always a lot of motorcycles outside?). QueenOfCuisine has been talking this place up for a while now, and I really wanted to know if it is as good as she said…

First thing’s first: the atmosphere. Mwr ruined it for me a little by texting “I already love this place!” as soon as he got inside, but it was still really great. Really laid back, really dark, and not really laid out so that anyone is in your junk and you feel uncomfortable. We were promptly served our drinks, and the waiter checked back an appropriate amount of times when we (mwr) couldn’t decide what we (mwr) wanted.

Now the Food: Queen told me about an incident where she had the best veggie burger ever at Relish, so that’s what I had. I had a bit of a problem with the caper mayonnaise since I really don’t like the idea of mayonnaise at all. I think deep down I knew that I should have trusted the chef, but instead I was a fool. I asked them to hold the caper mayonnaise. As soon as I received my burger, I knew how wrong I had been.

It was not like so many other burgers; it was served on lightly toasted whole wheat bread. This fact alone makes it much more accommodating to things like mayonnaise or mustard, and not so much ketchup. Something about daintily spreading ketchup around on toasted bread with a knife felt completely wrong. I was ashamed. I really feel like I need to go back to Relish as soon as possible and have the veggie burger with the caper mayonnaise. How it’s supposed to be… how it was meant it to be.

But back to the veggie burger. It came out sliced in half, each half pierced with a olive-laden toothpick. I do not like olives, but it was a very nice touch. The burger itself was very good; they make it in-house and you can definitely tell. It tasted fresh and savory… a real taste explosion. It came topped with lettuce, tomato, and red onion, all fresh and crisp. All wonderful. I don’t think I’ve ever had a veggie burger from a diner that wasn’t greasy or lacking in some way, until Relish. MMMMMmmmm.

For my side dish I was given the very difficult dilemma of: side salad, onion rings, or French fries? I got the onion rings, which were enormous and much less greasy/fatal than others. Unfortunately, I could barely eat half of them, and I was too stuffed to even think about whether or not they tasted good. I’m pretty sure they did though.

I will report back once I’ve revisited Relish and had the veggie burger WITH the caper mayonnaise. But tonight, we’re taking an SPF field trip to Quantum Leap (the restaurant, not one of my favorite shows ever), and just looking at the menu makes me want to drool all over the place.

TTYL!

P.S. - Sorry about no pictures... it was too dark!

Brunch

I agree with k about a lot of things, but this brunch v. lunch thing is not one of them. Brunch is partly about the sort of food you order, partly about the time of day, but MOSTLY about the attitude you have toward how you are eating. Lunch is a hurried thing that you grab quickly to assuage your hunger so that you can get back to working, or to allow the tension you've built up over the day to dissipate just enough so that you can work again. Brunch is slow. Brunch is about the company and the food, and usually about a little booze. If you're waiting for lunch for more than 20 min. you're irate. If you're waiting for brunch for under 20 min. you either don't notice or you're amazed that the service is so fast.

That said, RTR is wonderful. They do fancy without pretense. You go there and you see the ridiculous wall and the delicious menu with somewhat different foods, but you don't think "damn I should have worn nicer clothing". Well, I don't, but I tend not to feel that way in Wburg where everything is ridiculous. I feel that way when I actually think "I don't own anything nicer, there is no way I could ever dress appropriately for this place, I am a charlatan." I hadn't been for a long time and it was nice to be back.

So first the wait. I have a new found respect for Lodge. Their waiting area is wonderful. RTR, I guess in order to be profitable, or to feed as many as possible, has the entire floor covered in 2 tops, so no one can really wait comfortably for a table. Happily Oslo is a half block away and has the best macchiato I've ever had so I was happy. (a breakdown of where I drink coffee and what I get at each place is most. def. in the works). We get seated by our smiling, friendly, and competent (or at least competent seeming, which is like 85% of competence anyway) hostess.

Our silent waiter came over and I got the same faux rock shandy that Kendall described below and it was great. I really like being able to get something other than a screw-driver or bloody marry for brunch sometimes, so well done! I also ordered this dish that had 4 things on it: a tiny silver cup with apple butter, 2 large and thick slices of fennel-raisin toast (with cornmeal on the edges ... and srsly, there is not enough cornmeal in the north), a tiny souffle cup with grits and white grated soft white cheddar on top and another with 2 baked eggs topped with the perfect amount of cheddar.

It was a lovely, well balanced, and good sized without being too filling meal. The toast was probably my favorite part. It was sweet (but not too), warm, and just amazing. The grits were tasteful, which is I guess the best thing I can say about grits if it even makes sense to say. The eggs, well, I love eggs. I like 'em baked. I should say for the sake of full disclosure that the yolk were cooked all the way through so that they were yellow and not golden, but this didn't detract from the meal at all. We weren't rushed out even though it was WBpeak brunch hour, but we were well taken care of which is really nice.

Of course all of this would have been wasted if the company hadn't been so good, but the jokes and stories were flowing freely (no doubt facilitated by the great dining experience).

Cornichon sheds no tears

Cornichon is a spiffy little spot on Grand Street in Williamsburg that I've been meaning to try for a while. Grand Street is like, my favorite street, so it is important to stay informed. It's a "wine-bar and cafe" that has been there for about a year now, nestled among such Grand legends as Trash Bar, Lodge, and, of course, Fuggedaboutit.

They don't really seem to be pushing the whole restaurant thing, as the table situation isn't really optimal for dining and also no one else was really doing that. The bar is pretty much the prominent thing when you walk in, and it's nice, because wine bottles are just pretty. The decor is tasteful: refined but casual, with low lighting and plenty of candles. Perfect for a romantic dinner between Kendall and me.

And dinner we ate. Some bread came first, which is always exciting, but it wasn't anything special as far as bread is concerned. I got the Cabernet and K got the Pinot Noir; 7 dollars and 6 dollars, respectively (because I am just that much more classy).

And then there was brie. Though it is a bit of a shame that we both ordered the same thing, I can rest easy knowing that my dear friend got to enjoy this plate of pure delicious that is the Brie Presse as much as I did. It was so effing good. Melted brie, sliced green apple, and arugula on a baguette is a glorious idea, it turns out. The brie is, you know, salty and creamy and perfect, and then all of a sudden you get a crisp bite of oh so sweet green apple on top of it and all is right in your mouth. The arugula was just kind of a textural bonus that also added some bitter to the mix, unobtrusively hugging the sammy.

I really wish I was eating this right now.

It was 11 dollars, which is entirely reasonable, as is the rest of the menu. They have soup and cheese and tapas and salads, and also actual entrees! But the most expensive thing is only 15 bucks. Oh and there is also a 12 dollar brunch that includes a mimosa. Not bad (although I can't imagine being so tantalizingly close to Lodge brunch).

MMMMMMuch recommended; check it out!
http://cafecornichon.com/